Now That's Some Nutty Advertising

On the subway this morning, I saw the most incredible advertisement of my entire life. This is the eye-catching picture on the top of the poster:

Angst, conflict, trouble, pain. Here is a man in a suit, a business man, a respectable man, and he is crying out for help. He is poised, cell phone open. If only he had the courage and the wherewithal to make some monumental decision. But he is stuck. He is torn. He can not decide. What could possible sway his mind? Is there some way in which he could muster the courage to act?

"There Is!" claims the ad:


Peanuts.

Oh.

Wait. WHAT? PEANUTS? PEANUTS?

I've seen some absurd advertisements in my life, but I think "if you eat peanuts, you will have the energy (isn't it more 'gumption' than 'energy' anyway? Do peanuts give you nerve?) to call a girl" is just about the most asinine thing I have ever seen.

It's a simple message - Eat peanuts and be happy or don't eat peanuts and die alone. Sucks to have a nut allergy.

The worst part is that I can just see the sad ad exec, hopped up on a marathon viewing of Mad Men, coming into the office and putting forward his best Don Draper - placing a finished scotch glass on a coaster, taking a drag from his cigarette, and definitively explaining "we're not selling peanuts, we're selling love."

Whatever happened to the good ol' days of old fashioned peanut advertising - when instead of peanuts giving you love, they gave you something much more realistic...
Class.