The White House Puts Their Pants on One Leg at a Time

From the White House twitter feed:
America has a fever and the only cure is more cowbell!

We could have had medication but since we won't get health care reform, it's pretty much just cowbell.

Rush Limbaugh: "Barney Frank's Epidermis is Showing"

Two videos have been circulating today.

The first is a video of Barney Frank reacting to a woman asking him why he supports Barack Obama's Nazi health care policies:

Frank's key quote:

"On what planet do you spend most of your time?"

The second is Rush Limbaugh's reaction to that video:

Limbaugh's key quote:

"Isn’t it an established fact that Barney Frank himself spends most of his time living around Uranus?"

Then Rush Limbaugh grabbed Barney Frank's arm and slapped Frank with his own hand, asking repeatedly"why are you hitting yourself?" Limbaugh then gave himself the circle circle dot dot, circle circle square square combination, packed up his radio equipment and headed home, where his mom had Oxycontin waiting for him - cut into triangles, just the way he likes it.

It Would Also Be a New Job Description for the Team Doctor

(hattip, Amicus Bloggus Dan)

Though, I already wrote about this in the Huffington Post, there was one part of the Washington Post's article explaining why the Mystics don't employ a kiss cam (because same-sex kissing is controversial) that deserved its own highlight:

"We wouldn't broadcast on our Jumbotron about abortion issues because of the religious and political conflicts it would cause," said Lindsey Harding, the team's point guard. "It's a similar, sensitive subject. We don't want to put anything out there to turn down certain fans."

So because they don't want to offend "certain fans" (certain wimpy fans, if I may say so), the rest of us lose out on an in-stadium abortion cam?

We need to be entertained during timeouts!

Think of all the other things that we can't scan the crowd for and show on the jumbotron just because of politically correct concerns:

• Illegal Immigrant Cam - The Pepsi Party Patrol shoots 1 green card into the stands. Anyone who is here illegally and doesn't catch the green card is deported by Lou Dobbs.
• Stem Cell Research Cam - We watch as stem cells take on the characteristics of the cells in the seats around them. The crowd texts in their vote guessing which type of cell it will become.
• Tax Cam - As The Beatles' "Tax Man" plays, some of the best seated one percent of the crowd give up their seats to help the poorest seated 75% of the crowd.
• Global Warming Cam- The crowd cheers as the Heat-o-meter rises in the stadium. The zanier the crowd the higher on the scale it can go from "Ice Age" to "Global Meltdown"

If we can only have Cams that we all agree on, we're going to lose out on a lot. I hate that smile cam, for example. What are all those people hiding?